Six months of crying fits, screaming fits, temper tantrums, long drives, short nights and lots of rice on the floor kinda days.

Six months ago today we

landed in minus 40 weather

Just in time to be home for Christmas.

Many things look a bit different today.

 

I want to say that the time just flew by. 

Yet it also seems like some days

I look at the clock and think ...

Seriously ...

It is  ONLY 9 AM ...

Sometimes it feels like this ... this life... was always it. 

Sometimes it feels like - what on earth is going on?

 

How did I get here? 

All four of us have had crying fits, screaming fits,

temper tantrums, long drives,

short nights and lots of rice on the

floor kinda days. 

He is happy, sad, fussy, cries, screams and laughs alot.

He is full of energy and can change his mood in a heart beat.

He destroys things and is faster than I can keep up.

He is perfect. 

Our 'new' is staring to become our old.

 

And this is a good thing. 

He has adjusted well. 

We have worked hard for 6 months. 

Bonding and attaching. 

Intentionally staying home and not going out. 

At first it was hard but not impossible. 

We just know that this is the most 

important time we have to spend attaching. 

Helping him know we are his people. 

Because his first 2 years of his life he did not have the healthy attachment care that is needed to become a healthy individual. 

The function of attachment is to create a safe haven

and a secure place for a child. 

This helps them to trust themselves and others. 

This creates a healthy life long understanding of what it 

means to trust and be secure.

Here is a portion of an article from the Evergreen Psychotherapy centre on the importance of attachment in the first year ...

"The principal developmental task of the first year of life is the establishment of a secure attachment between infant and primary caregiver. In order for this bond of emotional communication to develop the caregiver must be psychologically and biologically attuned to the needs, emotions, and mental state of the child. Beyond the basic function of secure attachment—providing safety and protection for the vulnerable young through closeness to a caregiver—there are several other important functions for children:

• to learn basic trust and reciprocity that serve as a template for all future emotional relationships.
• to explore the environment with feelings of safety and security (“secure base”), which leads to healthy cognitive and social development.
• to develop the ability to self-regulate, which results in effective management of impulses and emotions.
• to create a foundation for the formation of an identity that includes a sense of competency, self-worth, and a balance between dependence and autonomy .
• to establish a prosocial moral framework that involves empathy, compassion, and conscience.
• to generate a core belief system that comprises cognitive appraisals of self, caregivers, others, and life in general.
• to provide a defense against stress and trauma, which incorporates resourcefulness and resilience.

Secure attachment can only be established in the context of a relationship that includes nurturing touch, eye contact, smile, positive affect, need fulfillment, and attunement:"

It is difficult when a child misses the bonding that is necessary in the first few years of their life with one primary care giver. 

So we became that now. 

We did with our daughter and now with our son. 

So six months later ...

It is not over by any means and we will not slack off now.

We continue to be intentional for a while longer feeling our way through it all, but truth be told it has been

nice to go out riding for a

few hours when grandma comes to visit. 

We start to breathe and relax - just a bit. 

They say it is a good thing when he fusses that I am not there or is not happy when things are changed. 

He is attaching. 

This is a good thing. 

We have been all doing well and we cannot believe today we celebrate six months of landing in Canada. 

I look back and much has changed in six months. 

He knows 'home' and knows Mama and Dada and Hana. 

He loves his puppy and 'tigger'. 

He has a routine. 

There are two of us in the kitchen 

one has been here almost 3 weeks  

and then there is me

he cries and comes running into the kitchen

and comes to me calling out Mama.

This is a good thing indeed. 

He is safe and warm and is getting bigger

and bigger every day. 

The best day was when I put 

a shirt and pair of pants on him...

and they were too small. 

He is growing. 

Our world is forever changed. 

And it is such a good change. 

God Is Good.

All The Time.